Bed of roses
by cindyblack424
Summary: AU Seeing her sorrow every day makes even his heart clench painfully,but when Mamoru has the chance to help her, he suddenly doesn't know if he can do it...the price seems to big UsaMamo


AN: Hello there, dear Sailor Moon fandom! This fic is a little tribute to the first anime that ever caught my heart, and also a little spin-off from my usual work…

It won't be long, maybe 3 or 4 chapters…also the first story on this account…and first in many other aspects too…

Disclaimer: Sailor Moon is the property of Naoko Takeuchi… I'm not Naoko Takeuchi…

Warning: It's M rated… it's not M rated for violence… why else do we rate M a story?... good job… I can see you caught on… (Don't worry, this chapter has nothing indecent in it ^^)…

It's Au...which means it's almost like the classic version of Sailor Moon, when they hate each other to the guts, only there's no Sailor Moon, or Tuxedo Kamen, or anything related to it. They're all completely normal teenagers.

Without further ado…. Enjoy!

-

Chapter 1

Mamoru noticed the moment he entered the arcade that something was different.

The silence took him by surprise, and he instinctively looked around trying to explain it for himself.

She was there. _She_ _was _there. So then why was there silence?

Mamoru looked more carefully at her trying to determine the sudden change in her behaviour. At first sight she looked just like she had failed another test. Head hung low, sour expression; she was exactly like after a hard day at school.

Except for the missing milkshake before her. And her red face, which looked dangerously close as if she had been crying.

What could have happened to make her this sad?

He made his way to her slower, trying to catch the eye of one of the girls. Finally Rei noticed him, and he mouthed the silent question: _"What happened?"_

"_Don't bother her." _She ordered.

He thought for a moment to obey, but then he saw her and he realised that maybe pushing his buttons a little wouldn't hurt. Plus it would look out of character on him not doing anything.

"So, Odango? Failed the year?" he tried to make his voice gentle with only a hint of mocking and he looked at her with raised eyebrows.

Rei threw a glare his way but he ignored it.

Usagi didn't react. Well, she did, just not the way he expected her. Instead of jumping at him like the hyperactive teenager she was, Usagi merely looked up at him with pained eyes and averted her eyes immediately.

"Not exactly" she mumbled.

He didn't know how to react to this, and it frustrated him. He should have come back with some witty, partially hurting comment, but he just didn't want to make her sadder.

"No entertainment from you today." He said at last with a soft sigh. "See you later!"

Usagi didn't even flinch as he left to the counter.

"I don't know what's wrong with her either. She didn't even order yet" Motoki whispered to him as he sat down. "And she's all moping around."

Mamoru watched her through the mirror behind the counter. He should have been happy. Well, not happy, but content. He could get some reading now, a privilege he never had, when she was in the arcade. However her sadness washed over the entire building leaving more sorrow on its path, thus saddening him too.

It didn't look good on her. The ever-angry-sunshine look on her face was secretly his favourite, but anything she wore (from bored to ecstatic) was way better than this tear-ridden, red-tinted face.

Suddenly he wanted to comfort her. To tease her, to hug her, or just simply stay beside her. Anything that would help ease up that expression. But he didn't do it, of course. Partly, because it would seem too out of blue, coming from him, and also because Usagi would mind it. She hated him more than she hated school. And no one would want comfort from her biggest enemy (as she so blatantly informed him numerous times).

Che! He probably shouldn't think too much into it! By tomorrow she would most likely return to her cheery self, forgetting altogether about any kind of incident that happened now.

Yes, that was how it was going to be.

-

It didn't happen.

The next day, when he walked in, the same dejected air was hanging around the arcade, and Usagi was sitting on the same spot, with the same sad expression on her face. And without any sweet treats in front of her.

Her friends were looking with worried faces at her, and when he silently passed them, he could hear a few words from their conversation.

"_You should go home…" _Ami's voice.

"_Yeah, I mean, it's not like…" _Makoto definitely.

"_Nothing bad…" _Rei.

_Nothing bad? _Did Usagi have problems at home?

Mamoru looked at Usagi again through the mirror. She was shaking her head and mumbling something that he was sure not even the girls understood.

They left half an hour later after everyone (except Usagi) waved at them. Motoki waved back and then looked at him with confused, worrying eyes. They didn't need words.

Something was very wrong with Usagi.

-

The next day she seemed to be better, but she didn't fool anyone. There was a milkshake in front of her, but it was still full.

"How long?" he asked Motoki.

"An hour."

He looked again at her face. Nothing changed. Still red from crying, with haunted, hopeless eyes.

She suddenly looked at him through the mirror. She changed, he realised. She was worse. Her face revealed a pair of ugly bangs under her eyes, most probably caused by lack of sleep.

And then her eyes widened, as if she had seen something that wasn't there before. He raised an eyebrow in silent questioning, but she just looked away, her face redder than before, an embarrassed look gracing her features.

He didn't even try to explain himself why he was so glad by the change. He just was.

She left an hour later without her friends, leaving the milkshake half-drunk behind her. It was better than nothing.

Mamoru could see. She would be better in just days.

-

The next day she avoided him like he was the plague. As soon as he entered the arcade, she turned away from the door, and began chatting with Minako about something stupid undoubtedly, if Minako's annoyed/amused face was anything to go by.

But she seemed better, and he had already missed their banter so he made his way to her.

"And I hoped I could finish my book today. Really now, couldn't you mop for a while around at least until I finish it?"

Her face changed before he could finish his sentence. In a moment her eyes filled up, with hopelessness and hurt, and he wanted to beat himself into a bloody pulp for bringing her back to her initial state.

"Then I'll leave, so you can finish your book… in silence" her voice almost broke, and she stood and left almost running.

The girls shot him a dirty look before leaving too.

Great. Just great.

-

The following day he entered the arcade with an air of determination. He would go to her and apologize for his comment, and then he would offer his services in helping her.

But she wasn't there.

-

Nor was she the next day.

-

He saw her purely by coincidence two days later, while he was helping Motoki with some boxes. She was in the smoking section of the arcade, a place she knew he would never visit.

She was alone, so he made his way to her without thinking twice about it.

"Usagi" he called out, when close enough.

She looked at him, a silent pleading evident in her eyes: _"Don't hurt me anymore."_

"Look", he cleared his throat, the words feeling strange on his tongue even before he said them. "I'm sorry… for hurting you yesterday, I mean. I didn't think you would react like this."

"I'm sure you didn't know." She mumbled.

"I…" he sat next to her, ignoring as the smoke invaded his lungs. "I've been watching you for days now. I've seen everything. And I'm… worried for you."

She looked up at him, eyes wide, incredulous expression.

"If there's anything I can help you with, just ask. This place is far too quiet without you screaming, and I can't even read here." He managed a half-smile, which was returned by her with a half-smile of her own. The first one in days.

"Thank you, Mamoru-san."

She didn't wait for him to say anything more. With a short excuse, she left him in the smoking room, with the milkshake, and the bill.

Not that he minded all that much.

-

The following day he couldn't go to the arcade. He had an essay and it was the last day he could work on it.

It was the first time he was angry on anything school-related.

He couldn't even focus on it properly. Usagi might have wanted to ask him help, and he wasn't there, and then he would lose every little trust she had for him. If she had any.

He was interrupted by a short knock on his door. Soft and hesitant, he almost didn't hear it.

When he opened the door, the person that invaded his mind recently was standing in front of him.

The very same Usagi Tsukino. She wasn't looking at him, instead staring at his slippers as if they had been the most interesting things ever to exist in the world.

"Usagi? What…?" he didn't know what to say. It was clear she didn't want to be here, and he didn't want to hurt her with a misplaced word.

"Am I… bothering you?" she inquired softly. "I'm sorry… never mind… I'll just…"

She turned around, and took a step to leave, but Mamoru suddenly caught her arm. He felt a pang of guilt as she tensed impossibly under his touch, but he ignored it.

"You're not bothering. Please come in. Do you want a cup of tea?"

She turned around and nodded softly still not looking into his eyes.

Half an hour and a cup of tea later she still wasn't talking. At fist Mamoru thought about leaving her to do things on her own pace, but it seemed as if she wasn't ready to talk yet.

Someone had to break the silence.

"How did you find out where I live?" he asked slowly, curiously.

"I asked Motoki" her voice was barely audible, but she seemed to get a grip on her. "I'm sorry…I am keeping you up…" she looked at the pile of books on the small table.

"You're not keeping me up. I was finishing anyway." A lie obviously, but if he told the truth, she would flee immediately from his house.

"No…" she was fidgeting, "I'm keeping you up… it was a mistake…"

"Usagi…"

"… I knew, I shouldn't have come… it's so silly… and stupid…"

"Usagi…"

"… and unethical…"

"Usagi!"

When she finally realized that he was calling her, she shut up abruptly.

"Could you please tell me, what's wrong? I'm not going to bite, don't worry."

She flushed at his comment and looked away in obvious embarrassment.

"I'm going to upset you very much…" she said finally. "But you're the only one who could help me…"

Mamoru waited silently for her to continue.

"…I'm incredibly embarrassed for having to ask this, and believe me, if the situation wouldn't be as hopeless as it is, I would never ask…I'm not that kind of person, but desperate situations ask for desperate measures, and this…"

Mamoru had a faint feeling that the entire monologue was practiced out.

"Usagi!"

This time she stopped the first time he called her.

"You can tell me, no matter what it is. I promise I won't laugh at you…"

"I'm not worried about you laughing at me…" she mumbled.

Another silence stretched out between them, while Mamoru waited for Usagi to be ready to tell him whatever she had to tell him.

Finally she took a deep breath and then:

"_Iwantyoutomakelovetome."_

At first the words were incomprehensible to Mamoru, but when he finally untangled them and looked at her completely serious face…

Laughing at Usagi was the last thing he had in mind.

-

So? What do you think?

In the next chapter everything will be explained…

Also, entirely opposed to my usual style, this time I will allow you to make the decision considering the ending of the story… in my mind there is a hot lemon scene, but I know that entering a fandom with an M-rated story is not the best way to enter a fandom…

The choice is up to you…

See you in the second chapter,

Cindy


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